Eastern philosophy often preaches the value of releasing desire as the key to happiness. We westerners don’t do so well with that. We like our goals. We enjoy attainment.
However, we also often forget the joy of pursuit. We wrap ourselves up in the need for achievement – the next job, the big sale, the smooth event. We forget about the pleasure of the road we are traveling.
We know we aren’t supposed to try to keep up with the Joneses. That that’s bad. And being enlightened people, we don’t. Because we’re good.
Except when we’re not.
And knowing how and when temptation or envy will strike helps to avoid mistakes.
So know that the Joneses are more threatening when they are close – when they live next door or were/are particularly good friends or are just like you but more successful. Know that these are the characteristics that make the Joneses more threatening.
We too often equate happy and satisfied.
They aren’t the same thing.
You didn’t get the big sale, promotion, or whatever? It’s okay to be unsatisfied, to hunger for more. It’s also okay to be happy at the same time. I’d even say it’s advisable.
The Miracle of Mindfulness by Thich Nhat Hanh, was the fourth book from my 2012 reading list and my first on meditation. This is my second of (1, 2) 3 posts on the book.
Pop quiz: Do happy people smile? Or does smiling make people happy?
Answer: Both.
Neuroscience research actually shows that smiling makes you happy. Even a forced smile stimulates the area of the brain responsible for positive emotion which sets off a domino effect of recognizing positive things, which brings more happiness, which makes you smile more, which causes you to recognize more positive things, which brings more happiness, which, well, you get the picture.
Thich Nhat Hanh describes one meditative strategy – the half-smile. He encourages making the half-smile a regular practice.
Basically, anytime is a good time to smile, and smiling anytime is a good way to rewire your brain to be happier.
Posted in Healthy Living
Tagged happiness, Miracle of Mindfulness, Noah Blumenthal, smile, Thich Nhat Hanh
Great blog by David McRaney about the money-happiness link. I think (hope) we all know by now that more money doesn’t equal more happiness. But there is a baseline, and the research is in. We all need enough money for the basics which it turns out is around $75,000, a little more or less depending on where you live.
Beyond that more money only gives the illusion of offering more happiness, but it does nothing for happiness, joy, sadness or stress. McRaney offers the brilliant quote from Thoreau, “A man is rich in proportion to the number of things which he can afford to let alone.”
More money is a game and it’s stacked against you with odds to make a Vegas pit boss drool.
Wanting less is the key to happiness. Appreciating what you have is the key to happiness. Savoring what you experience is the key to happiness. Expressing your love is the key to happiness. Engaging your passions is the key to happiness.
After food, shelter, and a DVR are paid for more happiness is free if you know where to shop.
We spend a lot of time pursuing:
Research repeatedly tells us that happiness is built from pursuing:
What if there was a scorecard for life?
If there was, I think the points would be tallied like this:
What would you give points for?
Do you know what country is the happiest in the world?
How about what are the 5 things you should do every day to increase your happiness?
This fabulous video will tell you. (Or maybe I just dig British accents. What can I say? They make me happy.)
Which would you rather have? A 3000 square foot house with a small yard or a 1200 square foot house with a swimming pool and a view?
How about diamond earrings or a year’s worth of spa treatments?
What would make you happier? 1000 possessions or 100?
This week Stephanie Rosenbloom of the NY Times wrote a terrific feature article about how money can and can’t buy happiness.
Turns out money can’t buy happiness if spent in certain ways. However, other purchases truly can lead to greater happiness.
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged happiness, money, New York Times, Noah Blumenthal, Stephanie Rosenbloom
It isn’t half full. It’s full. People don’t realize how lucky they are. Realize is the wrong word. It’s passive and fleeting. As though the important thing were to casually recognize every once in a while that, “Oh yeah, check it out. I guess I’m lucky.”
No. We need more than realization. We need active and consistent recognition. Your glass is full. Take a good long look at all the reasons that is so. Don’t raise objections. If there’s something less than perfect, let it go.
Right now, and every day, take just a minute (or more) to really examine what makes you lucky.
Why?
People who engage in daily gratitude exercises have been shown to:
They are more:
Wow. All those benefits just from spending a little time each day paying attention to what we’re grateful for? That’s pretty lucky.
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